The social law of reciprocation implies that we should always reciprocate good behavior.
According to this law, we feel obliged to reciprocate when someone gives us something.
For the same reason, we feel socially obliged to maintain a balance between giving and receiving.
In the Manual of Seduction I have shown how you can detect a woman’s subliminal signals by observing the soft signs in her body language. I have also described all what you can do to have a woman attracted to you.
Refer to the Manual of Seduction for a detailed description of how to learn to “read” women properly and attract them!
In order to understand your strength as a male and in order to control you in a relationship,a woman can use female selfishness and break the principle of reciprocation, either right from the start, or some time into a relationship.
When a woman is emotionally and sexually attracted to you and she behaves selfishly, she does so in an attempt to test how strong you are as a male.
This can be either a sign that her personality is not good enough for a relationship, or it can be a test of your Ego strength and leadership qualities.
You should be able to quickly detect what female selfishness is and know how to react properly to her behavior in order to make her attracted to you and keep her that way.
This kind of female selfishness is absolutely not the same thing as “average selfish behavior” in a person, regardless of their gender.
Female selfishness is a peculiar, different kind of selfishness with a clear process behind it. If you focus too much on the content and not enough on the process, you will not be able to see what is really going on.
This is not meant to insult the female sex. These behaviors are usually unconscious and dictated by instinct. Instincts are wild and do not follow the laws of ethics.
Most men usually do not understand the true meaning of selfishness in the case of women. They do not realize that it is not only a character trait, but also, and above all, a test.
This is where the word “bitch” comes from: men who don’t understand the evolutionary origins of selfishness in a woman and how to properly deal with it.
It is also true that some women who do this type of test are narcissistic psychos, but that is not true in all the cases; sometimes good girls can also test you in this way, and it is good for you to be prepared.
The difference between a truly selfish narcissist woman and a good girl is that a good girl will slowly stop this kind of behavior when you react to it like a real man, while the spoiled freaky woman will keep repeating that behavior again and again in the future.
You can encounter this kind of behavior both during the dating game and during a long-term relationship with a woman.
For example, during a date she will begin to speak non-stop about her needs in an almost arrogant and pretentious way, without the slightest consideration for your needs.
At this point, if you are a nice guy or simply a man without enough experience in female psychology and seduction, you will totally fail to understand the real point behind her behavior, and you will begin to feel guilty and try to please her over and over again.
This will quickly establish a double standard in your relationship, and she will start seeing you as a doormat, making her sexual attraction and respect for you fall faster than a bird shot by an M16.
Also, if you lose control, begin to get angry, and argue with her, you also lose the game. By having you argue with her, she manages to control her own sexual instinct, because when you argue, you are investing your energy into her at her command while showing that you cannot control your emotions.
As we have seen elsewhere, a woman finds it crucial to be able to control her own sexual instinct to avoid being at your mercy. So, whatever you do that helps her controlling her sexual instinct plays against you.
Now, this is the proper way of dealing with a woman’s double standard in matters of her needs versus your own needs.
1. The main thing you need to do is:
Take the role of an educator and educate her!
Each time she acts like a spoiled Princess you stay calm, take the role of the Patriarch, and begin to educate her about how to act properly.
Now, this is important: don’t tell her why and do not argue! Simply establish the law!
You establish the law by reframing every attempt she makes to establish a double standard about her needs versus your needs.
If she tries to argue with you, use humor and tease her back without losing emotional control.
For example:
Her: ”I want to go to Spanish restaurants; I only like Spanish; all other restaurants are simply disgusting” (and you sense she says this with that spoiled Princess’s attitude that pisses you off so much!)
You: ”Ah.. nice, let’s go to Spanish restaurants; I also like Spanish food” (do not address at all her spoiled behavior at this stage)
The following week:
You: ”I made reservations for us at the Chinese restaurant; I adore Chinese food..”
Her: ”I hate Chinese..”
You. (Here you tease her about her spoiled behavior) ”Don’t worry I am sure they have some dead bull killed by a scary bullfighter they can use to make a steak for you. Let’s go!”
Here, you pass her test, and she thinks ”Wow, what a man!”
Now, be prepared: if her personality is the one of the sexually submissive good girl, she will slowly correct this behavior, and her attraction for you will skyrocket.
If she is a narcissistic, spoiled, freaky girl, she will get angry, and will repeat her selfish behavior again and again.
Stay calm: it is her responsibility to correct her behavior, not yours. This is where freeze-outs are gold: just freeze her out for as much as you need to.
The longest freeze-out I have put into action with an MLTR of mine was… one year and a half long. Right now: she is with me again, telling me what a wonderful man I am, and how much she loves me.
Sometimes she says: ”I am not sure if I can say this… this experience with you taught me humility.”
This woman I am talking about was used to having her entire social circle stand up promptly and satisfy every needs of hers!
Now, she says: ”You taught me humility”
When faced with double standards… be the Patriarch and educate her! It keeps her wanting you!
Anyway, to be able to put this into practice, it is important for you to understand the whole picture of a woman’s psychology.
Franco, helping men since 2004
I’m wondering if I am currently experiencing a ‘freeze out’.
Honestly, I’m confused. In the last month my man has been
communicating less and seems very unavailable to me. I have given
time and space to allow him to ‘be’ and the distance continues to grow.
I have been looking at my own behavior and considering what this reflection
Is teaching me… It simply feels pretty shitty at the moment and I wonder
am I being treated poorly?… am I projecting my own shit?…
or am I simply experiencing a ‘freeze out’?… Sometimes going to women for this advise
back-fires with only a female perspective. There are so many man haters
out there… anyway thank you for your time and consideration.
Thank you for writing. Some of your words are shining light
in this dark unfamiliar place.
Dear Estee, thank you for your kind comment and appreciation. Sorry to hear about your situation. One of the possible reasons for a man reacting like this is long-term stress. Is he under a huge pressure for some reason that you may be aware of? See men tend to feel that they have to cope “by themselves” when they are under stress and tend to withdraw from communication. Anything you are aware of?
See rare men are aware of what a “freeze out” is.. does you man have any knowledge of it?
The very sad thing is that if your a good man like me looking for a good woman today you can certainly forget about it since Most women now are very high maintenance,very selfish, very spoiled, and very independent which is the real reason why many of us men Can’t meet one these days which we really Can’t blame ourselves either.
Population control.
Oh hell, these type of women are everywhere now unfortunately which makes it very sad.
After reading your post I feel compelled to admire your honesty. The world needs more women like you. I feel that you could possibly be experiencing a freeze out. I happen to be in a similar type of dilemma which is why I happen to be awake, searching for the answer. I happen to be at this stage in my relationship as well and had never heard the term before now, which was quite surreal after reading. My advice to you is you genuinely show concern for specific issues which may be plaguing your relationship. When a man feels slighted it can breed resentment; a feeling that “my feelings don’t matter”. I can’t speak for all men but, I can speak for myself when I say that when my girlfriend does this to me, she doesn’t even physically look like the person I fell in love with. I have no desire for intimacy and just prefer to be alone.
I totally agree with Mike 100%. What brought me here is last night I wanted me and my girlfriend to find a place together so that it would be our special hangout place. That idea went left fast. The area I took her to had so many places to chose from. When we got there I looked at her and said ok babe lets find somewhere together (making the evening an “us” event). Instead she instantly complained like a child “Im hungry” Im cold” I calmly replied “ok, lets find somewhere” she says “I don’t want to do this anymore, lets just go to your house and order pizza”. The fact that she had a tamtrum in public like a child blew my mind. I looked at her different the rest of the night, Then she wanted to kiss on me on the way to my house. My attraction instantly turned off. I ordered her pizza let her eat it. I had a drink and went to sleep. This isn’t the first time its happened. So I realized this morning that my girlfriend is selfish. After reading this I shouldn’t have ordered her nothing, let her go home and think on what she did wrong. This morning I woke up with a new perspective that nice guys DO finish last. This post has really made me see this relationship differently. Thanks alot
Sighhhh…..I DO NOT desire to attempt to ‘understand’ female selfishness:
This advice article reminds me of these aloof parents with bad -ss kids. “You gotta understand why Suzy/Johnny is kicking or biting and acting up” Try to ‘understand’ why my ‘little angel’ is so rotten.
I’m sorry but if this is what they call advice today and if men must psychoanalyze a….these SELFISH, POORLY RAISED, EGOMANIACS then I am better off without a woman.
I am NOT going to try to ‘understand’ the OBNOXIOUS behavior of a spoiled-rotten…BRAT. If you treat me poorly, there is only so much that I can take before I retaliate in kind.
…and no, I am NOT going to go the extra mile to try and understand her obnoxious behavior.
If we must still treat GROWN women as if they are 2 yr olds, then, as a society,…we are in some serious trouble.
I have NEVER come upon a site that shows women how to understand their brute of a boyfriend….because that would NEVER happen
By the way, I was in a relationship with just such a ‘little monster’.
Everyday was an EXAM….for me; what I NEED to do, what I SHOULDN’T do, what I MUST do…all to make life; HER life, happy.
Guess what? I failed EVERY test because I just got sick and tired of her ‘never being happy’.
It was always something with her. After taking the abuse for some time, I got tired of hearing ‘why’ she reacted and acted the way she did. SHE was the REASON WHY….
….so we can teach men to try and understand poor behavior…but if we don’t try and train the other side of the equation to not be so absolutely INHUMANE, then the problem will persist on into perputuity.
Not trying to troll or anything. Just being honest. I was with a woman, over 30 yrs of age…and it was like I was with a 3 yr old.
A selfish woman is like a black hole. Whatever you do, it/her can never be sated.
Fred you are very much right. Of course screening these women out of our possible choices is better. Anyway every woman, also HSE women do this at the beginning. It is one of their “hunting” tools to get men. The main difference is that the HSE (high self-esteem woman) will promptly begin to reciprocate when she finds the man who is able to “not let her be selfish.”
Yes Ron men have lost in many countries their role as protectors and educators of their group and this is the result.
I 100% agree with Fred. Moreover, feminist pushed for “equqaility”. With that in mind, men no longer need to be passing “tests”.
Hello Fred, I do not agree. You forget that feminism does not delete the instinct of getting pregnant. A woman will always test a man for safety – consciously or unconsciously – even if she uses a sperm bank for having children. Feminism only compelled women to “copy” male behavior. That is not possible in reality.
Franco, thanks for making this knowledge public, at the right occasions they should be reread.
is it right to practice the art of discomfort when she does not show to please you? in the sense… she puts her interests too much above yours and only gets a little time for you, maybe when you go to call her back on this she tells you: “you too could have done something, you could have insisted more (but you already have something for her you did). she tells me she doesn’t see me involved despite writing her a romantic message for valentine’s day.
this is a f***king double stand!
Hello Simone, one question and a comment. Please refer to my other post here about meta-communication. Did she says this: “You too could have done something” as a response to some meta-communication of yours? If so you can prevent this by avoiding meta-communication. It means that you should never have her put you into the situation of talking about the “relationship” Then about selfishness: it is in the nature of the woman to try to “suck” the man into her sphere of influence. Your job is to stop her from succeeding in it. You can do that by withdrawing the reward of your regal presence when she is being selfish and then when she gets worried you reframe by asking her to do something for you. Anyway afterwards you can always reframe this by kino. Getting close to her when she says “You should insist ore” while putting your hand on her ass and saying: “I am insisting now” would be a nice way of reframing the whole thing afterwards. This gives instantly to her the message that you could not care less about her manipulation attempt. It would create some discomfort mixed to sexual desire. Anyway being proactive is more powerful. You should never let a woman feel that she is entitled to talk about “the relationship” with you. Normally if you get there she will use it to try to get power over you more. Every woman has conflicting feelings about getting power over you: a part of her wants to get power over you, another part of her despises you if you let her do that. Difficult to be a woman…