One-itis is a very painful and damaging condition, if you’re unlucky, you’ll get infected with this illness especially if you’re young and lack experience with women.
If you don’t know what one-itis is, here’s a definition:
“Obsessively thinking about ONE woman to the extent where you feel so attached to her, if anything happened to end the relationship you feel like killing yourself.”
Think about it…
Has this ever happened to you, you wait for the girl to text you for hours, you think about doing everything with her and you see her as your only option in life when mating is concerned.
When you have one-itis you are totally crazy about the girl and she takes up 80% to 90% of your mental energy as you dream all possible scenarios with her including all sorts of crazy sexual fantasies over and over again.
Replaying emotions and thoughts on an endless loop, just you and her.
Since one-itis is an illness (which I’ll tell you more about in a minute) you can face a long list of very negative outcomes:
● You will be emasculated (become a lower male) and reduced to the role of “male girlfriend.”
● You will lose – almost definitely lose – your cherished girlfriend: she will flat out dump you or utter the dreaded words: “I love you but I feel that we cannot be together, I feel only friendship for you.”
● You will be drained of mental energy to the point where it becomes increasingly impossible to focus on your business, hobbies and other social relationships.
● You may fall into a financial hole, unable to make significant life decisions like forming a family, having children or buying a house.
It is crucial that you learn how to get a girlfriend WITHOUT one-itis. Its a way better way to live your life… because when you have one-itis you start doing strange things like:
● Call her all the time
● Send her messages all the time
● Try to please her too much
● Put her on a pedestal
● Begin to treat her like a “pure, sexless Madonna”
● Act jealous and possessive around her
● Get into a very painful state of self-hypnosis (= being obsessively focused on something)
IMPORTANT NOTE – one-itis kills attraction faster than flipping a switch.
YOU GET DUMPED quickly when she sees you displaying one-itis.
Women are strictly TURNED OFF by men with one-itis because it communicates lots of unattractive characteristics.
She WILL LEAVE YOU EVEN IF SHE LOVES YOU.
The good news is you can prevent her dumping you and prevent future girlfriends from dumping you too with one thing: experience!
Being relaxed, comfortable and confident around women comes from experience and before you start giving up because there’s so much work, its actually easy.
I’m going to give you a few short-cuts to quicken your learning curve.
Listen, you’ve heard this from women before right:
“I want a man who knows how to treat a woman.”
Do you know THIS is what they actually mean?
“I want a man who has been with so many women that he will not put on a pedestal, will be able to lead me and my emotions and not treat me like a sexless madonna.”
As women have been oppressed for centuries when it comes to sexuality they cannot say this openly (though there’s some improvement, many women still hide their voracious sexual appetite).
There are huge advantages in kicking out one-itis from your system, like:
● She starts seeing you as “The Prized Catch” and will never lose sexual attraction for you.
● If she is the good girl type, she will never cheat on you.
● If she is the adventuress type she will consider you Mr. Number One in matters of having fun. All the other men with one-itis will be felt as “boys” compared to you.
● If she is materialistic you will be able to have an unfogged, clear mind with which to spot her manipulative ways of taking advantage of your financial capacity.
With that lets jump straight into the 10 signs you should look out for…
1. Self-hypnosis: you begin to think obsessively about her from the morning to night. This isn’t normal feelings of love… If you get a normal feeling of loving a person you feel a sweet feeling of happiness and that does not keep you from focus in other areas of life.
Solution: when you get into this state learn to recognize it in time and shift the focus on your business, activities and your social circle. Think: “Yes, I like her and.. it cannot be such a big thing for me quitting having a normal life”
2. You begin to see less and less of your social circle, forget to call friends, begin to be less able to focus on work and business. When you give up your social circle turn her off big time.. Women like men who are successful and a leader among men. How could you be successful and a leader of men if you give up your friends?
Solution: Increase contacts and outings with your social circle instead of reducing it.
3. You begin to feel that she is “pure” and “unique” and that “no other woman on the Planet could ever be so good and pure”. You may begin to deny the fact that she is a sexual human being and as such likes huge mind blowing sex like every other woman on the planet.
Solution: when you begin to have such thoughts like “ohh.. she is such a good and special girl, she is so pure and would never be wild and out of control” realize that you are getting into one-itis.
4. Learn to recognize a female “purity card”. Women when attracted to men are almost invariably prone to put this card on the table to get you into an exclusive relationship. Take it as a compliment: if she does that it means she likes you.
Its one of the most powerful cards women use on men to obtain exclusivity. It means that she will actively and subtly begin to present herself to you as a “good and kind girl” who would never be sexual.
Solution: realize she is human being and as such surely great in some areas and very much imperfect in others. The purity card is one of the tools at her disposal to hook you. Many women have learned that men are scared of female sexuality and run the purity card on them when they want to catch the man.
5. Wrong mindset about female exclusivity. This is a huge factor which can have you get a very bad one-itis when you get a girlfriend. Women do not want or like man who wants them exclusively!
Women like and want man who get other women easily!
A woman is hard-wired to desire a man who can easily get other women! When you get into one-itis it may happen to you that you begin to promise exclusivity to her without her having done anything to deserve it!
Solution: if you catch yourself promising exclusivity to a new girlfriend without her having done anything to meet your needs and your desires and without her having demonstrate to you how fit she is for a good relationship with you this brings you directly to one-itis. Realize that in this case you are promising exclusivity not because you really want it but because you want to please her for your fear of losing her.
She reads: this guy cannot easily get other women and her attraction goes down while you get deep with your neck into one-itis
6. You begin to get angry and nervous if your friends make comments about her natural desire as a sexual human being. Again a bad sign that you are getting into one-itis.
Solution: take it easy man! She IS a sexual human being as a woman. Your friends are very much right about that. Consider this: would you like her and desire her if she was a zero on the sexual scale?
7. You become jealous and possessive, begin to control what she does, follow her, go through her mobile while she is not seeing you, read her email, ask her where she has been and so on. Realize this: by doing this stuff you basically give her the message that you are not able to get other women at will! That is a huge turn off for every woman (They will never admit it but this is the way it is!)
Solution: you need more experience with women! Without that you will always be in a state of alert and nervousness at the idea that she might having sex somewhere else and with someone else.
8. Failing to escalate to sex at the beginning and “waiting to make her comfortable with it” is another sure sign that you are getting into one-itis. You are being hit by the Madonna/whore complex and virtually castrating yourself as a man in order to avoid losing her. One of the most sure signs you are getting into one-itis.
Solution: when you like a woman you can escalate to sex as soon as you have elicited attraction in her. If you are not able to detect when a woman is attracted to you and not able to do enough to attract her that means it is not the time to think about how to get a girlfriend for real…You first need more experience of women in order to get in better touch with female sexuality.
9. Madonna/whore complex. When you follow your thoughts about women you tend to divide them into “good women who are pure and not that wild about sex” and “bad women, who are whores, bad girls and too open to sex”
Solution: realize that such a thing does not exist in reality. ALL women are sexual human beings. The main difference between a good girl, an adventuress or a materialista is not “how much she wants sex or does she wants sex in the first place”.
The main difference is about the end value they are after: a good girl wants to conquer your heart and establish a loving relationship with you, an adventuress wants to have sexual pleasure and fun with you, a materialista wants to control her own attraction and sexual pleasure with you enough to be able to reach your credit card.
ALL these women want sex. Including the good girl: actually good girls can be very often the ones to be extremely passionate and sexual!
10. Forgetting your own needs when you like a woman. One of the most important skills you need in order to avoid one-itis is a good touch with your own needs and safety.
If when you begin to like a woman you notice that you are beginning to forget your own needs: being calm, relaxed, eating well, resting well, dedicating yourself to your hobbies, enjoying your social relationships and so on that is one of the most sure signs you are getting into one-itis and a huge turn off for your girlfriend to come!
Solution: it is always a good practice when you get a girlfriend to deliberately check are you still satisfying your needs like you did before. Realize that healthy self-love is one of the major features in you which make a woman like you!
Learn to recognize the difference between falling in love, loving and having one-itis!
Falling in love, loving: for the adult mature man it is a calm, relaxed thing which adds value to his life. The fundamental pillars of his life are not “shaken” by the falling in love and the loving. He is the same man and is enriched by the experience.
One-itis: it is an obsessive painful condition where you begin to feel anxious, depressed, think obsessively about her and make all the mistakes in the book in matters of being around women. Your world is “shaken” by her.
If you have one-itis you need more experience about women and seduction, much more than a girlfriend!
When you want to become experienced in all the areas of dating women and female relationships all what you need is the Manual of Seduction by Franco
Franco, helping men since 2004
