An “orbiter” is a guy who is all the time “around” a hot woman mostly without getting laid with her.
It is usually so that the orbiter is in the subservient position. He does nothing to her attraction. He is with her in the so called “male girlfriend” role.
These guys are for her like the girlfriends she chats with when she is around in bars and restaurants. The term is quite often misused in the PUA community. Men with confidence with women realize that she “might” be having sex with the orbiter as well if she has nothing better around.
They understand that the crucial factor in regard to the position of “orbiter” is not the sex: it is his subservient position towards her. In the Manual of Seduction is described the important meaning of the subservient frame in dealing with women.
Anyway the most frequent situation is that the orbiter is not getting laid with her. He is subservient to her and he uses him for company and/or emotional validation.
Sometimes her orbiters are ex boyfriends or ex husbands. If she is of the Adventuress (Freak) type she might have fun with orbiters because they “entertain” her like clowns do. She might want to keep him as orbiter in the case he is financially important to her if she is of the Materialista (Ho) type.
If she is of the Good Girl type as I have described in the Manual of Street Pickup Getting the Good Girls she will relate to this in a totally different way.
An orbiter is any “other guy” whom she keeps at “arms length” for the purposes of her emotional validation and social power.
This is quite often connected with the betaising (emasculating) process which I have described elsewhere.
At the beginning of your relationship with her she is in the stage of running her tests for alpha on you. Till you have passed her test and while her attraction for you grows the two of you are in what I call the stage I of the betaising process: “The stage of the tests for alpha.”
When I use this term: betaising process, I do not mean that every guy is necessarily going to be betaised by every woman. You should see this like a process happening in the interaction between you and her.
“Betaising process” is a term I use to describe this phenomenology of the female I have discovered trying to achieve complete power over her alpha by making him weaker psychologically with the purpose of having him attached to her and only to her.
I have been with women of the Adventuress type who can try to betaise you with very rough means for example by heavy drama, by demanding exclusiveness while keeping for them the right of being sexually promiscuous or even by the means of violence.
After the stage I of the betaising process the two of you get into the stage II.
The stage II of the betaising process I call with the name: “Open up to me, Honey!” stage.
Take this stage as a “compliment.” If you get there it means she is incredibly horny for you and considers you as a real man.
At this stage virtually every woman will start to say in an increasing fashion things like:
“I would like you to open up to me more.”
“Feelings are important, I want you to understand how I feel.”
“You should not be so tough. You should be sweet to me.”
There are many, many variations of the above.
There are very big risks for a man connected with the stage II: she can completely castrate you psychologically when you do not understand well the dynamics of it.
In my opinion masculine men will react to her “Open up to me more” negatively. They will feel something “strange” in their guts and will begin to withdraw from her “Open up to me, Honey!”
Men who are AFC and with a high degree of femininity in their personality will be betaised i.e. changed into a girl.
They will start to chat with her like a girl would do.
Very masculine men with a strong leadership will “make a logical space” for her complaints about “communication”, agree to “communicate” at a certain extent and will not take her seriously.
In my experience the hotter she is and the stronger is her sexual drive the more she will behave like I describe above in the relationship.
This is the way the female of our species gets mental power over the alpha male after she is sure she got one for herself.
At this stage she will start a “battle” to have you open your heart to her. This battle will be extremely wild.
At that point you will be put to choose between your mental peace and being betaised.
You will lose your peace because she will increasingly ask you to “communicate” in a way which is not natural to a man and you will be betaised if you agree to it.
It is a Double Bind from her and meant to achieve total power over your mind. If you agree to “open up” she will double bind you by saying: “That is not enough. I feel we do not communicate enough” if you do not agree to “open up” to her she will say you are a male who does not understand communication and “cannot express feelings.”
When a male agrees to “open up to her” more, more and more that will have slowly her sexual desire for him go down.
Instead the sexual desire of female goes up and is all the time up for you if you do not take seriously her “please open up to me” and have the communication with her happen on your terms.
HSE (high self-esteem) women and LSE (low self-esteem) women will do this in different ways. I will describe elsewhere how HSE and LSE women to through the betaising process soon.
When the two of you will be in the stage II when she will notice that you are resisting it the more you are alpha the more she will counter act your resistance to the “opening up” by trying to make you jealous.
At that point one possible scenario is that she will use the orbiters to do that.
Another mean will be to use her girlfriends´ opinion about you.
A wonderful technique you can use to enhance her sexual desire for you and keep it up all the time is to “push her away” a little bit when she reaches the stage II, the stage of “open up to me.”
I am soon going to publish a book about all the stages with the new identified stage of betaising process III.
So keep yourself tuned.
What you can do when you detect that she is in the stage of the “open up to me” which is the stage II of the Betaising process is to take charge and begin to calibrate communication in order to bring her where you want: more and more sexual attraction for you, more and more horniness feelings directed towards you.
At this point of the process you can begin – between the other means – to direct her where you want by pushing her away and guess what.. to do that you can use her orbiters.
Yes, the same men who make so jealous the average AFC (average frustrated chump) can become extremely useful to you for increasing your woman´s sexual attraction and have her coming back for more all the time.
I am not saying you “should” do this, I am saying you CAN do this – depending on your goals.
The reasons you could have to do this are so many and it is difficult to list them all. You will need to go through training for example by consultations or plenty of field coaching to be able to recognize them all.
This comes through experience.
When she is in the stage II of the Betaising process as attracted woman she will begin to give you rich verbal descriptions about other guys, usually the orbiters or even guys who really has some value for her, “orbiting” around her.
Especially if she feels that you are not “opening up to her enough” she will give you rich descriptions about “That friend of mine, Joe, who is such a great guy and so sweet.. and is so good in talking about the feelings”.. or if she is a Materialista maybe.. “I know this guy, Michael, who has that big house or huge sport car there and there.. “
Good Girls usually do this only if they do not feel safe in the relationship in which case you should ask from yourself why they do not feel safe with you and calibrate it before you do anything else.
If you detect that the woman is an Adventuress or a Materialista then go for what I say here without a second thought!
She has deserved it.
With the Good Girl – instead – try to understand why she is doing that and where is that she does not feel safe.
In my opinion almost all the hot chicks will do this at a certain stage because there is no man on the planet who can open up to a woman “that much” without becoming a … girl
The Good Girls will not put you to compete with other guys on the mental level if they feel safe with you.
So the more masculine you are the more you will get these rich descriptions about other guys.
The hotter she is and the bigger is her MPS syndrome (Magic Pussy Syndrome = her psychotic belief that she is entitled to receive special favors because she is a woman) the more she will give these rich descriptions about other guys.
When she is at this point just observe her, take time and one day, when she is keeping the speech “You do not open up to me enough” you start to push her away by saying..
“I think you should have a chat with Joe, remember, that guy who is so sweet..basing on your descriptions he is a great guy.. bla, bla bla..”
“Hey, I think that at this point it would be good for you to talk about this with Michael, I think he has a lot of experience about this..you said he is a man of success.. I am sure he will have great ideas about it..”
After you say that tell her that you are busy with something, your business, whatever.. and freeze her out.
I am not saying here that you should not communicate with your woman. The central point is: you should communicate with your woman like a man – not like a girl.
If you “open up” in the way she intends the “opening up” you will become.. a girl and her attraction for you will die.
This pushing her away back to her orbiters puts you very, very fast in the position of the Prize.
You become even more in her eyes the Prince, the alpha of the group, who is not scared of other men.
This hits her Magic Pussy Syndrome badly and freezes her circuits. She will feel: “Jesus who is this guy? He is even pushing me to be more with the others?Am I not attractive to him???”
You need to do this in a totally random, laid back and indifferent way, like you would be talking about football or the next hamburger you are going to eat that evening..
In my experience that makes women chase you badly, makes them very, very horny on the sexual level.. and wanting to come back for more.
Be careful: this can transform her into a stalker if not calibrated well.
This is dangerous if put in hands of men without experience of women, if you do not calibrate it well you can put her so down that you can lose the girl.
The same thing in the hands of an AFC is like a suicide: doing what I write here requires quite a high level of field experience with women.
When done well it keeps her horny all the time and coming back for more. You can literally have her becoming obsessed with you. One question I am been asked quite often during consultations is how to calibrate this stuff.
By calibrating well this stuff you can be the master of your female relationships.
Franco, helping men since 2004
Hi Franco thank you very much for this article. I have been consulting with you and your advice is very spot on.
Can you describe what you mean by Good Girls need to feel safe? In relation to this article, wouldn’t making a good girl feel safe mean just opening up to her more, and now she gets her way (more communication)? What’s the difference between making a girl feel safe and betaization? Thank you
Hello Domingo, the difference is determined exactly by the girl’s self-esteem. In the HSE girl (high self-esteem) there will not be a lowering of attraction when he takes a leading position and makes her feel safe. The betaization will happen if the girl (HSE or LSE) will feel that he is having her open up to “get something from her”, usually sex. Women (HSE or LSE) do not operate from a frame of “fair exchange” (this is what nice guys usually believe!), they operate from a frame of worship and dedication to the guy that makes them feel attraction and safety (the HSE girl) or only attraction (the LSE girl) The LSE girl responds badly to creating safety because.. she does not appreciate herself and her own body.